I Want My Pager Back

When I was in high school, I don't remember one kid having a cell phone; we all had pagers. A friend would page you with their "code" or phone number, and you would call them back whenever you could find a landline to use. "Online social networking" consisted of your pain-in-the-butt dial-up connection which took you to your "You've Got Mail" AOL account. Other than that, keeping in touch with friends was accomplished using home phones with answering machines and stuffing folded notes into lockers between classes. Wasn't that so much simpler? People were patient, because they had to be.

Now, things are different. I'm a little peeved at technology because it's beginning to feel like an ever-tightening leash around all of our necks. Yes, it has it's glorious attributes such as online grocery shopping with delivery, DVR, and iPods, but technology has turned us into instant gratification whores who can't wait for ANYTHING. Just because I have a cell phone, home phone, Facebook page, and email account, it doesn't mean (in my opinion) that I am obliged to always be accessible. When you call, maybe I'm legitimately unable to answer the phone because I'm swimming in my pool or I'm at the gym or in a movie . Or, maybe I just don't want to talk to you right now.

We all have that friend or relative. You know, the one who will call your cell phone and leave a voicemail when you don't answer. But then, if you haven't returned their call in 3-5 minutes, they're calling your home phone, Tweeting at you, texting you, and posting on your Facebook page variations of, "OMG, why aren't you calling me back? Are you mad at me? What's wrong???" They assume something horrible has happened to you because there's no other reason you wouldn't be reachable at all times. Put yourself in my shoes for a minute. Let's say I was using the little girls room. Hearing my cell phone ring followed by a voicemail chime, and then hearing my home phone ring, and then hearing a text notification on my cell makes me think something horrible has happened to YOU! And now we've both gotten ourselves worked up for an imaginary emergency, and I probably wasn't too successful in the little girls room because I couldn't relax. Oh, and by the way, if something horrible HAD happened to me, I wouldn't answer the phone anyway no matter how many times you called.

I realize I've probably made everyone who knows me afraid to ever call me again. This was honestly not my intention. But with that said, just leave a voicemail. I'll call you back when I can. (Or when I want to....)